


Don't Make a Fuss

by DoreyG



Series: Fooling Around (and Falling in Love) [2]
Category: Red Dwarf
Genre: Alternate Universe - Daemons, Daemon Touching, Daemons, Established Relationship, Fainting, Kryten does not get paid enough for this, M/M, Relationship Reveal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-30
Updated: 2014-10-30
Packaged: 2018-02-23 05:36:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2536118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoreyG/pseuds/DoreyG
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When he enters the room, on his usual third cleaning run of the day, he finds that he can’t quite believe his eyes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Make a Fuss

When he enters the room, on his usual third cleaning run of the day, he finds that he can’t quite believe his eyes.

“ _Sirs_!”

Mister Lister, sitting on one side of the console and staring blankly at an equally blank screen, starts so hard that he almost tumbles backwards off his chair. _Lexi_ , and he _does_ feel guilty for referring to her as that but it’s in his head so he’s _pretty_ sure that it’s okay, scuttles anxiously up his sleeve. Rimmer, on the other side of the console and staring very intently at a keyboard, yelps out loud and _shoots_ to his feet. _Khissi_ slides off his shoulders, and gently unfurls to the floor.

He stares. They stare. The daemons stare.

“Kryte,” Mister Lister offers desperately, waving his arms so hard that he half fears a dislocation (he debates pointing out that there’s no anaesthetic left on board – it seems cruel, at this juncture), “it’s not what it looks like, man.”

“What does it look like?” Rimmer splutters, by now bright red and trembling in a way that is equally disconcerting (my, the medical bay is just going to be packed to the _gills_ today), “it doesn’t look like _anything_ , Lister. What could it possibly look like, after all? _Nothing_.”

He stares silently.

“ _Rimmer_ -“

He stares _silently_.

“Did we break him?” Lexi’s shrill voice rises from _Mister Lister’s_ jacket sleeve, drilling its way into his synthetic eardrums like it always does (though he’s not quite sure what the medical treatment for daemons in this situation would _be_ , his databanks never prepared him for _this_ ), “Oh God. We broke him. He finally _broke_ and it’s all our fault-!”

“Lexi,” Khissi rumbles calmly, and immediately the shrill voice of Lexi quiets and… The trembling of Rimmer actually seems to _still_ , just a little (Khissi, at least, doesn’t appear to need medical intervention – unfortunately his databanks never really prepared him for _that_ either), “It’s _fine_ , love. We didn’t break him, he’s just taking a while to come to terms with… Dave’s explanation?”

He continues staring silently.

“…At least, I _hope_ -“

He continues staring _silently_.

“Not helping, Khissi,” Mister Lister interrupts, and… Oh, presses a gentle hand to where the lump of Lexi still shudders in his jacket, smiles an integrating smile as he steps forward like absolutely nothing in the universe is wrong (wow, this really _is_ proving a day for the databanks), “look, Kryte, I know that you might have it in your big mechanical brain that people don’t touch each other’s daemons, that it’s _taboo_ -“

“Because it is,” Rimmer spits hastily, and then twitches hastily, and then sinks back against his keyboard hastily as… Khissi actually reaches her own hand to press against his wrist, a sympathetic touch that leaves his head reeling (his databanks reeling. Wow, he is _really_ going to have to do some cleaning after this), “I mean, it’s not _really_. Although it is a bit. Although, really, when you look through recorded history-“

He continues his continuation of staring silently.

“ _Also_ not helping, Rimmer…”

He continues his continuation of staring _silently_.

“I can’t be responsible for a _murder_ ,” Lexi starts wailing again, obviously unnerved by the silence to such a degree that she has to quite obviously start worming her way into _Mister Lister’s_ arm (databanks, querying whether to actually just shut down and call it a day), “even if it is of _him_. What will people think of me? What will _daemons_ think of me? Oh, all because we traversed that last fearsome taboo-!”

“Stop _panicking_ , darlin’,” Khissi offers, _still_ gently patting Rimmer’s wrist like that’s going to do any good. Like she’s done it before, _many_ times judging by the lack of burning embarrassment flashing across the man’s face like a beacon (databanks, _really_ wanting to just shut down and call it a day), “it’s not like it’s that much of a taboo. Lovers on earth touch each other’s daemons all the time.”

He-

Oh.

“And stop looking at me like that, _all_ of you, you know it’s true-!”

He-

_Oh_. 

“ _Khissi_ -!” Mister Lister and Rimmer, together, spit out at exactly the same time.

… _Together_.

(And his databanks, regardless of any panicked shrieking that certain shrews may be doing, take an executive decision and plunge him into blissfully sensible darkness.)


End file.
